Category Archives: Socialization

Don’t Shoot

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If you use Twitter, Facebook, Instagram or simply watch the news, I’m sure you’ve heard about the killing of yet another unarmed black man, Alton Sterling.  The officers were caught on video by civilians in Baton Rouge. The video shows the two officers killing Sterling in cold blood. Sadly, this is probably another one of those incidents where the legal system will pull an excuse out of their ass as to why the killing was justified. Within the first three months of 2016, police killed 250 UNARMED people. What has been done? In most cases, nothing.

I can’t justify whether the police were TECHNICALLY right or wrong in the case of Alton Sterling,but time and time again it is proven that police apprehend black suspects completely different than white suspect.

As an African American Woman I feel like I have a target on my back. I know that all police officers aren’t racist and all police officers aren’t going to shoot without just cause, but they don’t come with warning signs on their foreheads. “There aren’t bad officers just bad people with badges”, as Dr. Jesse Jackson III stated. Whenever I see a police officer behind me in traffic I get nervous, not because I’m doing anything wrong,but because I don’t have to be doing anything wrong for them to pull me over.

Let’s discuss a few facts and statistics:

Education

Education is suppose to be an equalizer,right?  African  Americans are twice more likely than Caucasians to not finish high school. It is also more difficult for African Americans who graduate from college to find a job compared to Caucasians with the same level of education.

Legal System

Let’s say a Caucasian man kills an African American and an African American man kills a Caucasian man. Both crimes were committed in the same manner, in the same state. The Black man is more likely to be charged with felony murder. Black youth are also more likely to get charged as adults than White youth. But, White privilege doesn’t exist, right and the justice system is equal,right?

I hate walking into a store and being followed because the owner is under the assumption that I’m going to steal because I’m Black. I hate being spoken down to because people assume I’m not intelligent because I’m Black. I’m tired of working ten times as hard to earn something that was just handed to someone because they are White.I’m tired of being scared for my life because I’m Black. It’s almost as if Black people are being hunted. We get harassed if we’re in certain neighborhoods because people think we can’t afford to be there because we’re Black. We get pulled over and searched simply for being Black.

I try to tell my family members, friends and social media followers not to harden their hearts to an entire race of people. I try to keep people uplifted, letting them know that we can’t harden are hearts and exhibit hate. It is important now more than ever to pray for one another, to look out for one another and to speak up for ourselves and for others. In case you haven’t realized by now this is why the movement #blacklivesmatter is so important. Not because our lives are more important than others, but because they are equally as important and we do not deserve to be shot down in the middle of the street like dogs.Our lives matter because we are HUMAN-BEINGS. I would also like to add that while I understand that we need to highlight these meaningless killings, I do not agree with making a video of HOMICIDE go viral. Have we forgotten that people like Alton Sterling have children and family members?  While police brutality and these deaths are no secret, I don’t believe that we should sub-tweet,re-tweet, Etc these gruesome videos in respect for ones family.

April 30, 2014: Dontre Hamilton (Milwaukee)
July 17, 2014: Eric Garner (New York)
Aug. 5, 2014: John Crawford III (Dayton)
Aug. 9, 2014: Michael Brown Jr. (Ferguson)
Aug. 11, 2014: Ezell Ford (Florence)
Aug. 12, 2014: Dante Parker (Victorville)
Nov. 13, 2014: Tanisha Anderson (Cleveland)
Nov. 20, 2014: Akai Gurley (Brooklyn)
Nov. 22, 2014: Tamir Rice (Cleveland)
Dec. 2, 2014: Rumain Brisbon (Phoenix)
Dec. 30, 2014: Jerame Reid (Bridgeton)
March 6, 2015: Tony Robinson (Madison)
March 31, 2015: Phillip White (Vineland)
April 2, 2015: Eric Harris (Tulsa)
April 4, 2015: Walter Scott (North Charleston)
April 19, 2015: Freddie Gray (Baltimore)
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Yes..No..Maybe

be-my-friend

I’ve been thinking about something a lot lately. How in the hell do you make friends as an adult? As a child it was easy to make friends. You could sit next to someone eating the same type of sandwich as you and become best-friends the following week. But,as an adult, its not that easy. I always worry about coming off as a creeper when trying to make friends.I don’t even know how to approach the matter, do you magically just one day become friends without the mention of it. Then there’s always the fact that you could think you’re friends with someone and you really aren’t. For example, at my last job, I had gotten really close with one of my co-workers. We always talked and even worked out together. We went car shopping, grocery shopping and had even met each others families. I thought we were friends but it comes to find out, they just thought of me as a cool co-worker. Talk about a slap in the face!

Shucks, maybe it is harder for me to make friends because A.) I don’t go out often, I’m usually working and B.)I’m perfectly fine with being alone so sometimes I steer away from socializing. Typing that out and reading it aloud really makes me sounds nuts! But, in all seriousness, I’ve asked a few people and we’ve all agreed that making friends as an adult isn’t easy. A lot of things contribute to the hardship(s) of making friends, one main reason being… it is difficult to trust others as adults. As kids we were naive and thought we could trust everyone. Life has taught us otherwise. As kids things were simple, now there are so many politics and other bullshit involved in befriending others. It makes it kind of difficult to even converse with people…everyone wants to be right. Then you have friendships that turn into situation-ships ruining a chance at whatever friendship there was. Personally, I’m very standoffish the smallest thing in a big way could send me walking in the other direction. That may have not made sense. Let’s say someone said,” I hate when people are gay.” That is a small thing in a big way. Although I’m not gay I take offense to that. I most likely would shut down and no longer pursue a friendship with that person.Of course, I respect other people and their opinions but in my opinion saying something like that is ignorant and I don’t want to befriend a person who would say something along those lines. Again, as kids things were so much easier.

It’s easy to meet people and hold a conversation with them but how do you move past the initial conversation? There is this girl on my Instagram,she seems like an awesome person and probably would make a kick ass friend. We speak on Instagram occasionally but never more than a few words.  I would actually like to build a friendship but again how do I go about it? I think I would come off a tad creepy if I got in her DM and said hey, I would like to get to know you better…or something along those lines. She would probably think I wanted to make her my girlfriend because most people for some reason always assume that someone is attracted to them. Then there’s the whole trying to be friends with someone who is attracted to you or that you are attracted to. Shit just gets complicated. On top of it all even if you do befriend someone, the longevity of the friendship seems to always be short lived. As adults, we often let relationships, work, pride and so many other things come between friendships. Then you have the type of people that never want to hang out and if they do hang out with you they’re stuck looking at their phone the whole time. I text and surf the Internet just as much as the next person but I like face to face interactions WITHOUT having our phones glued to our hands. What’s the point in being in the company of someone if you aren’t paying them any mind?

 Am I thinking too hard on this?

I think this is exactly why dog is mans best-friend. If it weren’t for social media I probably wouldn’t know a lot of the people that I know now. It is much easier to befriend people over the Internet through sites like Facebook but even then, you can come off as a creeper, or come across someone who seems like a creeper but might not actually be. Ugh, then there’s the awkward moment when you actually meet them face to face for the first time. I met a girl in 7th grade off of Black Planet,we became really close and eventually looked at one another as sisters. We finally met and young out when were in high school. We still talk occasionally but it seems like the older we got the more we drifted apart. That happens a lot with childhood friendships. People move away,they get jobs, they have families, etc.

The idea of making friends as adult makes my head hurt, there needs to be some sort of rules to this or levels…something. Geesh!